Joan of Arc? Not in my Defense...

Has it been 2 months?! Whew, I've been so busy with the homeschool convention.

So, my father calls me the fighter in the family. I don't think he meant it to be rude. My name means "lioness of God" for a reason. I have spent most of the last 39 years (yes, I am a 69er) fighting for what is right. Sometimes based on my opinion. Sometimes based on my expectations. Sometimes based on what is in the Scripture- chapter versable stuff. Fighting never-the-less. 

As I have aged (think fine wine here) the Lord has faithfully allowed me to go through some desert experiences (see Deut 8). He has put me through some very humbling times. Isaiah says He wounds and then heals. I have endured some wounds in the last few years, but I have also been given Healing Waters. 

I am less and less inclined to fight- Him and others. I am more and more aware of my testimony as a child of God before others. If I claim His name, I need to be sensitive to show His love to others. I am learning that the world is ever watching, and they are offended by our in-fighting and back-biting manners as "Christians." 

I am tired of the fighting. I don't know that I have the balance down. I think it is important that we take stands. I do not ever want to compromise, but I do not want to fight either. I don't think that was Jesus' example. What do we accomplish? What is our testimony? Do we seek reconciliation? Restoration? Peace? 

Isn't there something better we can do with all this energy? As a wise older woman of God told me this weekend- "I will not defend myself. The Lord does not want me to defend myself." She was in a position where defense was not inappropriate, but she chose humility instead. Instantly. What a beautiful testimony. I want to be like that when I grow up.