Identity Crisis

Frankly, I have many. But at this time I shall limit it to my blog. I cannot believe it has been 8 months since my last post, yet with all that has gone on in our lives (jobs while homeschooling, travels, finishing all the house projects and putting it on the market, researching housing in OH and then NC, continuing ed in Biblical counseling, and so on) I am not completely surprised.

My job is winding down this week. I now find myself with "free time" and I'm nervous about how to assign it. Ironically that means that it is getting frittered away, a bit. But I am enjoying quiet days at home walking and talking with my sons, getting through all my emails, completing laundry in a timely manner, keeping up with the crumbs on the counter, dreaming and praying about what to do next, and so on.

Back to the Identity Crisis. What to do with the blog? What to post? When to post?

I think I will make this blog my designated family blog. It will be where I share the happenings in our family... for our family afar. I think I will start another one for all my "deeper" musings. I have toyed with different posting ideas. I am still playing with ideas, but I think the title will be:

Faith... Fatally Flawed yet Forgiven and Free (an enemy Loved).

I know, I try too hard. I feel I need to have it all, and then its too much. Passion does that.

Musings

A Day of Sweet Surprises

Bumble Bees, Dear Friends and so much more...

OUTSIDERS

First Fruits from the Container Gardens...

Caution! Objects in photo appear larger than they are! :0)

INSIDERS

After much babying, I woke up to the Gardenia in bloom again!

FRIENDS, FLOWERS and CHOCOLATE

THINGS DONE

Flowers from Jan's Garden, Lunch at Wildflowers Cafe...

and a stop at the incredible Sunflower Field. 

There was a theme to our lovely afternoon! 

Such a dear lady! Thank you, Jan.

A SHOUT OUT

To Cynthia for spending hours at Starbucks with me Monday 

catching up and pouring out our hearts. Here is to Truth and Love, dear friend!

THINGS TO COME

Tricia (in the middle- a long lost friend from high school) 

is on her way for a visit! Tomorrow we drive to Indy 

to meet another HS friend, Kathryn, for lunch. 

 Sweet times call for sweet Chocolate Zucchini Bread fresh from the oven.

It's been a nice couple of days... 

good things still to come.

The Lord's blessings to you as well.

Joan of Arc? Not in my Defense...

Has it been 2 months?! Whew, I've been so busy with the homeschool convention.

So, my father calls me the fighter in the family. I don't think he meant it to be rude. My name means "lioness of God" for a reason. I have spent most of the last 39 years (yes, I am a 69er) fighting for what is right. Sometimes based on my opinion. Sometimes based on my expectations. Sometimes based on what is in the Scripture- chapter versable stuff. Fighting never-the-less. 

As I have aged (think fine wine here) the Lord has faithfully allowed me to go through some desert experiences (see Deut 8). He has put me through some very humbling times. Isaiah says He wounds and then heals. I have endured some wounds in the last few years, but I have also been given Healing Waters. 

I am less and less inclined to fight- Him and others. I am more and more aware of my testimony as a child of God before others. If I claim His name, I need to be sensitive to show His love to others. I am learning that the world is ever watching, and they are offended by our in-fighting and back-biting manners as "Christians." 

I am tired of the fighting. I don't know that I have the balance down. I think it is important that we take stands. I do not ever want to compromise, but I do not want to fight either. I don't think that was Jesus' example. What do we accomplish? What is our testimony? Do we seek reconciliation? Restoration? Peace? 

Isn't there something better we can do with all this energy? As a wise older woman of God told me this weekend- "I will not defend myself. The Lord does not want me to defend myself." She was in a position where defense was not inappropriate, but she chose humility instead. Instantly. What a beautiful testimony. I want to be like that when I grow up. 

Add Ons to the Last Post

Few things give me the thrill that organizing gives me. Just ask Pookie. I am sure I drove her nuts begging her to let me re-arrange cabinets and furniture. Such patience she had!

Three more organizing ideas:

Julie Morgenstern is like the Grand Master of organizers. The rest of them all got started with her! She may be a bit deeper than you want, but she covers it all and gives a great foundation. That is why  the three books on my last post were so helpful and inspiring. They were quick, easy and put things back in the forefront of my mind, but I am glad I had read Julie's books a few years ago.

Emilie Barnes has some lovely ideas and thinks it can all be done in 15 minute increments. That is quite a relief for most of us. It may take you MANY 15 minute increments, but that is easily squeezed into ANY schedule! She tackles every area of life from entertaining to labeling. Barb R.- might be a great way to organize the boxes for Africa! See her section on the card file box with 3x5's and coordinating numbers on boxes. 

For time management many have found Elizabeth George's book helpful. I read it. It IS good. It is practical and riddled with great Scriptural encouragement. However her sample of a poor schedule (that was apparently NOT a good way to live and had driven her to her doctor' office numerous times) looked fabulous to me, a DREAM schedule. Needless to say I did not get it, and I still struggle with that one. Apparently reality and I do not co-exist. :0)

So have fun and let me know how it goes!

2 Gifts I Gave Myself- Christmas 2008

I gave myself the gifts of better health and better organization. I only have one body while on this earth and it isn't getting any younger. I still have so much I want to do for the Lord, but it really is more difficult when I physically struggle. So here's to good health! And the Lord has been trying to teach me the value of simplicity for almost 5 years. I struggle to get it, but I am trying! His processes are not usually what I would choose though! So on to a more disciplined home and calendar/planner.

Why do these things always involve pain? And patience? And lots of work?!

I tried Jillian's exercise DVD on Christmas Eve. On Christmas Day I could not raise my arms. At all. Listen, I ride 9 miles on the bike in the basement-with hills AND hand weights. I did not expect it to be THAT bad! I started the aspirin as soon as the DVD was over, and I continued the aspirin for the next 24hrs. So on Friday I tried it again using only 1.75LBS weights. Much better-after more aspirin. I still hate that 20 minutes (did it again yesterday), but there is hope.  I know it says 30-Days, but I plan to do it every other day so I guess it will take longer?  I suppose the pain is a good sign?! Time and aspirin will tell. Thanks for the tip, Shawn!

These books (I got the three pack on the Amazon page, scroll down) by Marcia Ramsland are written very simply. I am not sure I will learn a lot of new ideas, but it is great to have it in the forefront of my mind again. She simplifies and brings clarity to the process of organization. She is also encouraging! I needed the push to get things in order again. I am amazed and disheartened about the disarray around here. Where did all the stuff come from, and who is going to dust it all?! 

Saturday Christopher helped me inventory everything in our two pantries, and then I re-shelved everything in an orderly fashion. I think I don't 

need groceries for a while!!!!!!! Good grief. 

Sunday we went through all the Christmas stuff and put a bunch of it in the Give Away pile. Yea! It will be nice to have less stuff to get out next year. Often we do not use it all anyway. Getting in the spirit of things, while I was getting a hair cut Christopher came up with the idea to have two decor categories of bins (tree stuff and hous

e stuff) for the bins of junk, I mean items. So now it is sitting on the floor waiting for me to put away. Of the fun.

Later this week I want to move on to the desk in the family room. You know, the bill paying, postage, paperwork, mail piles? We'll see. I did pick up file folders and such at Office Depot today. So, no excuses!

In the end these are gifts well worth the effort. Now on to the effort. 

What did you give yourself this year?

Oh, say. Christopher gave me something as well. It came in this box...

That is enough to get the old heart rate up!

;0) THANKS, Babe!!!

Where do they go...?

Merry Christmas from the Corcorans

Click on the above link for a fun greeting from us!

Time, days, weeks, years, money, expectations and so on?! They just seem to vaporize before our eyes! Mine anyway! The Lord tells us to be mindful of every thought and word and yet I find they flit about me without nearly enough intentionality.  I MEAN to pay attention. I really do. I have Very Good Intentions, and then I find another week, month, year has gone by and I am still playing catch up.

The Lord keeps telling me to simplify, and I keep muddying up life with many good things that are detracting from the great, the best. Here is an example: the above link to the fun elf dance should have taken me what 15-20 minutes? It took 40 minutes. In that time I could have cleaned the bathrooms, gotten dinner ready for tonight, planned Isaac's 6th grade curriculum for January (at least gotten a good start) or many other fine choices. There is nothing wrong with the fun elf dance. It just took longer than expected and all this small stuff adds up to a full day of not really anything. Ya know?

Another example: I was watching Larry Kudlow last night (I tend to watch him when I am brain dead and ill-as I had the stomach flu yesterday, odd I know) and they were talking about the need for Americans to SAVE MONEY right now during this time of economic breakdown. But we just signed a contract on Tuesday for thousands of dollars of new window and doors. Now we did not plan to do this now, but a brick was thrown through our window while we were in Indiana for Thanksgiving-and we don't live anywhere near the hood! So, rather than replace one 16 yo builder's grade window in the front of our house we are replacing them all. Sure we will save on utilities, but that is not what we had planned.  When will the debt end?! We also got to replace all 4 tires on my car last month, oh the fun.

I keep meaning to teach the boys how to study the Bible well & journal, how to cook, Dave Ramsey's tools for finances, manners, the rest of Young Peacemakers, etc and yet another week goes by, another month, another year and soon they will be gone. No pressure, huh?! I really want to prepare them well for their futures.

Expectations, well, I am glad that the Lord is constantly disillusioning those!  However I do want to have goals, and make decisions that actually move me toward these goals rather than mucking up time, talents, treasures and keeping me from those goals. It just seems as time goes on I am more distracted and busy and unclear than ever. I cannot stand this. I really want 2009 to be about the things that matter most, and not find that yet another year has gone by without seeing the best pursued. 

How about you? For what do you yearn? What do you constantly find on your mind as you begin a new year soon?

I am trying to really really get that the small things add up quickly to something big. That could be in your favor or against it. Be careful. Be intentional!

The Built-ins!

Wayne Schechter of Yankee Woodworking-wood master and Mike Wilkerson-self employed floor master (wood, carpet, tile, slate, whatever), both made the beauty of our home possible. I finished the built-ins to match the floors. They are all in maple. The pictures make them more yellow than they are in real life. We are so very thankful for how they enhance our home! The mantle will be built soon and then I can stain and finish that as well. It would be nice to have that done by Christmas for the nativity scene. :0)

Thanks guys! It looks GREAT! Now on to fill them with stuff. The stuff that has been lying all over my floor for the last few months. Yea, soon we will have places to sit again!

Learned Something New!

OK, I know that some of you are way past this level, but I just learned how to link a website to a word (i.e. in my Depression post Patiently Hope and Quietly Wait below, and also here, I linked the name Spurgeon to the actual site of his sermon- READ IT E & M). So now in my blogs you can just click on the word and go directly to the site. Cool. Thanks, Cynthia C. for teaching me how (and Keith C. for showing your dear wife!). Let's practice.

Did you know that if you sign up for Planet Smoothie's e-newsletter (OK, Mom & Dad, click on the words Planet Smoothie) you will get a free 22oz. smoothie for your birthday? I just had mine last week. Yum Yum!

Here's another one. A Child's Hope Intl. is trying to save the starving children in Africa, and also to get children adopted-locally or from over seas,  and also to get local children in foster care. Check them out!

That is all for now. But it is not all for good. I will be back! I still have that Tagged thing to do for Jaime, family picts to post....

See ya!