What Do I Want Most?

It occurred to me today that Bearing Fruit has much been on my mind of late. I think about it daily. I walk around in frustration from the lack of fruit in my life.

Debt reduction, weight reduction, even complaining reduction, more joy, more relationship, more kindness and gentleness, more Bible study, more writing, more teaching, more education. These are constantly on my mind. 

See, I want to honor and glorify God. I really do. He has given me life and an eternity in His presence. His Son has redeemed me from wrath. I have been given SO MUCH. There is SO MUCH I want to give in return. I want to live a life of thanksgiving. 

Then it finally hit home. I finally know what my problem is (I hear your thoughts! One of my problems anyway)- it is that I am still all about me. Oh I figured since I wanted to honor the Lord it was fine if I demand things on my terms. I have plans. Great plans. All for Him. Um, except that it has continually been a fight for my terms. 

As I see Him ebbing away at my pride, and my foolish confidence in things of the flesh, I am strangely coming closer to peace. I think my father would say I am getting old. An acquaintance, Pastor Larry Wilson, recently blogged about a similar realization.  

The Apostle Paul also spoke about this many times. He seemed so other worldly and full of rejoicing and thanksgiving. He seemed to fight the fight so well, almost careless of the surrounding circumstances!

The same God that promised He would not forsake Paul, and the same God that promised Paul that He would complete what He began, is the same God that promised He will bear fruit through me. Hmmm.

Ephesians 2:10 puts it well:

"For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them."

Joan of Arc? Not in my Defense...

Has it been 2 months?! Whew, I've been so busy with the homeschool convention.

So, my father calls me the fighter in the family. I don't think he meant it to be rude. My name means "lioness of God" for a reason. I have spent most of the last 39 years (yes, I am a 69er) fighting for what is right. Sometimes based on my opinion. Sometimes based on my expectations. Sometimes based on what is in the Scripture- chapter versable stuff. Fighting never-the-less. 

As I have aged (think fine wine here) the Lord has faithfully allowed me to go through some desert experiences (see Deut 8). He has put me through some very humbling times. Isaiah says He wounds and then heals. I have endured some wounds in the last few years, but I have also been given Healing Waters. 

I am less and less inclined to fight- Him and others. I am more and more aware of my testimony as a child of God before others. If I claim His name, I need to be sensitive to show His love to others. I am learning that the world is ever watching, and they are offended by our in-fighting and back-biting manners as "Christians." 

I am tired of the fighting. I don't know that I have the balance down. I think it is important that we take stands. I do not ever want to compromise, but I do not want to fight either. I don't think that was Jesus' example. What do we accomplish? What is our testimony? Do we seek reconciliation? Restoration? Peace? 

Isn't there something better we can do with all this energy? As a wise older woman of God told me this weekend- "I will not defend myself. The Lord does not want me to defend myself." She was in a position where defense was not inappropriate, but she chose humility instead. Instantly. What a beautiful testimony. I want to be like that when I grow up. 

Inconsistency and Anger.

How do I consistently live so inconsistently?! 

On Mondays I meet with two dear ladies to discuss the Scriptures from a counseling aspect. We are currently studying Anger in the Word. We are going alphabetically through themes. Oh that the entire world was alphabetized, I digress. I sat and read at least 50 verses on Anger. I was touched to the core with the Lord's words on the prideful anger in our hearts. I got the difference between sinful verses righteous Anger. I really did get it, and agreed I with His wisdom.

Within an hour the boys woke up and proceeded with their morning routine of annoying each other, along with running around, wrestling, and thundering about upstairs. They weren't doing their chores (so nicely posted on the fridge in colors with alternating weeks so as to be "fair"). They weren't getting dressed, etc. so that they could begin their school work. They were whining about something, but I cannot remember what. Boy did I yell.

I had had enough of their lack of gratitude, self-control, and self- discipline, of their noise, bickering, inefficiency, and so on. Honestly, today I do not even remember what it was that ticked me off so much. I sit there thinking that I am justified in my Anger because they are sinning, again. I think I deserve better behavior from them, and I do. I am not unreasonable in my standards.

Yet I know that my response does not please the Lord. I know that I have not rested on His authority or sovereignty in their lives. They should know that their sinful behavior has consequences, and affects the lives of others greatly, but how to teach them that without raising my voice?! Don't they need to get an idea of the concept of wrath? Don't they need to know they do not sin in a vacuum? Don't they need to know they are driving their mother crazy (to paraphrase my own, dear mother)? I don't know.

I just want peace, and respect, and less sticky stuff all over the house. I would like to say something and just have it done. No arguing. No rebelling. No them going to play PS2 instead. 

Does the word Idol come to anyone's mind?!

Anytime I counsel another or when I reflect on my own desires (that, again, are not in themselves sinful) I hear my precious Father say to me, "My little Lioness, stop roaring and listen to Me. Are you listening to Me? That is all I want from you as well. Not unreasonable, eh? Why can you not meet My requests either? Are they too difficult for you? Are they insane demands from an unloving enemy? Dear, daughter, they are too difficult for you without My Spirit, but I have provided Him to you. You are still a masterpiece in progress, as are your sons. I've forgiven you thousands upon thousands of times. Extend Grace. Extend Forgiveness. Rest. In Me."

So, I  am trying to be quieter today. I have reading in Leviticus to do and also more Anger studying. Wonder what challenges lie ahead today? Thanks be to God that I am not alone and He will give victory. For His glory and for beauty. 

The Love Challenge for February

My friend Dea has challenged us to memorize 1 Cor 13.1-13 during the month of February!

Let me know if you will join us. I think she plans to post reminders and encouragements throughout February. What a great challenge, thanks Dea!

Next post I will put up picts of CA for those of you who did not see them on Facebook. Plus I really want to see them again myself. :0)

For many of us we are surrounded by snow and lacking simple things such as heat and power. Let's remember to thank the Lord for His gift of this beautiful white stuff that replenishes the earth (and kills the germs), but also to ask Him to protect all those out there with no electricity! Evansville, IN was hit particularly hard.

Short post folks. Enjoy it when you can- usually I have so much more to say. Off to work from home for a couple of hours. See ya! Stay safe out there.

Add Ons to the Last Post

Few things give me the thrill that organizing gives me. Just ask Pookie. I am sure I drove her nuts begging her to let me re-arrange cabinets and furniture. Such patience she had!

Three more organizing ideas:

Julie Morgenstern is like the Grand Master of organizers. The rest of them all got started with her! She may be a bit deeper than you want, but she covers it all and gives a great foundation. That is why  the three books on my last post were so helpful and inspiring. They were quick, easy and put things back in the forefront of my mind, but I am glad I had read Julie's books a few years ago.

Emilie Barnes has some lovely ideas and thinks it can all be done in 15 minute increments. That is quite a relief for most of us. It may take you MANY 15 minute increments, but that is easily squeezed into ANY schedule! She tackles every area of life from entertaining to labeling. Barb R.- might be a great way to organize the boxes for Africa! See her section on the card file box with 3x5's and coordinating numbers on boxes. 

For time management many have found Elizabeth George's book helpful. I read it. It IS good. It is practical and riddled with great Scriptural encouragement. However her sample of a poor schedule (that was apparently NOT a good way to live and had driven her to her doctor' office numerous times) looked fabulous to me, a DREAM schedule. Needless to say I did not get it, and I still struggle with that one. Apparently reality and I do not co-exist. :0)

So have fun and let me know how it goes!

A Quiet Christmas Eve Morning

Good Morning! I sit here listening to Third Day sing Christmas songs on our new Denon system that Christopher picked out. He does not know it is here (my thanks to EBay!). I got up early to set it up as a surprise. 

It is a dark, quiet and rainy Christmas Eve morning. All the guys (and Phoebe) are asleep. I sit here contemplating our Lord and am amazed at all the fuss we mortals make at Christmas, in the Name of Christ. 

Yesterday in the car Christopher and I discussed that we feel behind and guilty about our Christmas preparations based on requirements defined by others. In the midst of it all it is so easy to lose sight of our Saviour. And isn't that really the whole point? Really? Why do we let the world define our lives and what is good? Why would we compare ourselves to what we see around us and concern ourselves with keeping up? Doesn't this just serve to distract us from a quiet & gentle heart in love with and satisfied by our Lord? 

I worry about not having enough traditions. I worry about not making it meaningful enough. I worry about not enough special memories. I worry about the boys not seeing a Saviour in the mass of preparations and events. 

Then last year we found Behold the Lamb. Andrew Peterson has been doing this concert for about 10 years. He always ends the circuit here in Cincinnati. We went again this year and were able to share it with special friends as well. This is a night of worship and laughter. It is a night of music and also of the whole story of Jesus in songs. It always reminds me of the awesome majesty of our Lord. 

I don't know what traditions you hold. I don't know if right now you are on the road, in the air, or preparing for guests. But I pray that you find some quiet moments to praise our Lord and to rejoice in His gifts to you: His gifts of forgiveness and life; His gifts of grace and mercy; His gifts of everything you could ever imagine to ask for- that really matters anyway.

All praise and glory to our Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ!

Merry Christmas and a Blessed 2009, from our hearts to yours!

Where do they go...?

Merry Christmas from the Corcorans

Click on the above link for a fun greeting from us!

Time, days, weeks, years, money, expectations and so on?! They just seem to vaporize before our eyes! Mine anyway! The Lord tells us to be mindful of every thought and word and yet I find they flit about me without nearly enough intentionality.  I MEAN to pay attention. I really do. I have Very Good Intentions, and then I find another week, month, year has gone by and I am still playing catch up.

The Lord keeps telling me to simplify, and I keep muddying up life with many good things that are detracting from the great, the best. Here is an example: the above link to the fun elf dance should have taken me what 15-20 minutes? It took 40 minutes. In that time I could have cleaned the bathrooms, gotten dinner ready for tonight, planned Isaac's 6th grade curriculum for January (at least gotten a good start) or many other fine choices. There is nothing wrong with the fun elf dance. It just took longer than expected and all this small stuff adds up to a full day of not really anything. Ya know?

Another example: I was watching Larry Kudlow last night (I tend to watch him when I am brain dead and ill-as I had the stomach flu yesterday, odd I know) and they were talking about the need for Americans to SAVE MONEY right now during this time of economic breakdown. But we just signed a contract on Tuesday for thousands of dollars of new window and doors. Now we did not plan to do this now, but a brick was thrown through our window while we were in Indiana for Thanksgiving-and we don't live anywhere near the hood! So, rather than replace one 16 yo builder's grade window in the front of our house we are replacing them all. Sure we will save on utilities, but that is not what we had planned.  When will the debt end?! We also got to replace all 4 tires on my car last month, oh the fun.

I keep meaning to teach the boys how to study the Bible well & journal, how to cook, Dave Ramsey's tools for finances, manners, the rest of Young Peacemakers, etc and yet another week goes by, another month, another year and soon they will be gone. No pressure, huh?! I really want to prepare them well for their futures.

Expectations, well, I am glad that the Lord is constantly disillusioning those!  However I do want to have goals, and make decisions that actually move me toward these goals rather than mucking up time, talents, treasures and keeping me from those goals. It just seems as time goes on I am more distracted and busy and unclear than ever. I cannot stand this. I really want 2009 to be about the things that matter most, and not find that yet another year has gone by without seeing the best pursued. 

How about you? For what do you yearn? What do you constantly find on your mind as you begin a new year soon?

I am trying to really really get that the small things add up quickly to something big. That could be in your favor or against it. Be careful. Be intentional!

What was I...?

Do you ever walk into a room to get something and forget what is was you were going to get?

Do you ever start to say something and then forget your point?

Do you ever go to do something and then forget what you were going to do?

Ever forget someone's name? Someone you've known for years?

I remember struggling mightily once to remember the word, table. Ugh!

Tonight I opened my email to retrieve who knows what so that I could go to who knows what website to take care of who knows what. So, I decided to blog about it all instead. Maybe it was all the sugar I ate for dinner?

I found out about Sandy the personal assistant from Robin's Heart of Wisdom blog. I guess you sign up for her free(?) reminder service. She reminds you to send birthday cards (YES!!! I KNOW I NEVER GET THEM OUT), of tasks to do, calls to make, anything I guess.

I always tell my husband I need a good wife. Maybe I just found her? The Lord did not bless me with a brain that remembers things (YES!!! I WRITE IT DOWN) but. Ok, honestly. I had a great one-liner coming, however I just forgot it. Honestly.

So I've kept her website open on my desktop for two days so that I don't forget to try this. If I just add her to the list, she'll get lost in the fry. Now to just find the time to train dear Sandy.... 

Counseling Philosophy- Final Draft

Here it is! This is the final draft. A little something to give those who wonder what Biblical Counseling is all about. It is not exhaustive, but I hope it is helpful. There is power in the Word, and we are all in this together!

Counseling Philosophy of Arielle Corcoran

People Face Problems

Do you find yourself struggling to trust God in the midst of ongoing trials? Have you replaced Him with wants that are over emphasized in your life? When you face struggles, whether self-imposed or imposed on you by others, you also come face to face with God. You need to seek the truth about Who God is, and what He has promised you. When in a confident relationship with God you can find peace of mind and purpose.

 

God Offers Promises and Principles

When you struggle with issues you need to start at your circumstances and move inward, deeper to the beliefs and wants you have about the issues at hand. This includes a look at your expectations about the situation and the people involved. At that heart level you can figure out God’s guiding principles for changes, endurance, and for hope you need to go on day to day.

 

Freeing and powerful change comes at that heart level through God’s Bible and His Spirit. Just changing behaviors is not enough to endure the messy ugly stuff of life.  Daily you have things that you need to submit to God. Sometimes you face something too large to tackle on your own, and your perspective is too wrapped up in emotion and circumstances to see God or His promises and commands to which you must cling. It is not unusual to need the counsel of another going along with you to help you find life giving perspectives that return you to a strong relationship with the Lord, for His glory and your joy.

 

God Has Tools for Your Help

We are in all the messy stuff of life together. The church is all the Christ-followers in every nation. He has told us all and equipped us all to mentor, or disciple, one another. In times of crisis a biblical counselor’s “one anothering” is able to offer you hope, and purpose, as well as personal change. Their tools and skills come straight from the love, grace and power of the Lord through His Spirit and the Bible. A biblical counselor is under the authority of the Lord through His Bible and His Spirit, and a biblical counselor is also under the authority of the elders of their local group of Christ-followers, their church. The elders hold the counselor accountable as they help you stay accountable to the Lord and what He asks of you as you. “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.”(2 Corinthians 1.3-5)

 

Though it is helpful to use resources along with the Bible for the practical application of God’s principles, a counselor must handle these with great care, using materials from authors that believe the Bible is authoritative and inerrant. A biblical counselor ought not use materials from authors that have their foundation in psychology, which does not have a godly foundation and often is at odds with the Lord and what He says in the Bible. What we have been given in His word is sufficient to: bring Him glory, endure life with hope for tomorrow, transform us to Christ’s image, give us strength and guidance. “His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature and escape the corruption in the world caused by evil desires.” (2 Peter 1.3-4)

Some great resources are at: CCEF, NANC, and  Biblical Counseling Foundation 

To Be or not To Be- a Halloweener

Bruce, the pumpkin (by Aaron H.)

So is it cheating if I post an article from Scott Bennett that is posted on his wife's, Joy, blog???

Whatever. Here it is:

What are your plans for trick-or-treat this year? Will you lock the door, turn off the porch light and retire to the basement? Will you go shopping, or out to eat? Or will you embrace the reality that dozens of little lost souls are parading up to your front door with their hands out, asking you to give them something — anything?

For the first few years of our marriage, Joy and I were the former. To us, participating in any Halloween activity was an endorsement of the demonic. It meant we were OK with the fake human cadavers and the blood-soaked mock murder scenes up and down our street. To us, Halloween had gone way too far, and we were not about to participate. In hindsight, that was not a biblical response.

As years went by, we became convicted as we began to see that the Bible calls us to have a much different attitude toward society. Instead of burying our heads in the sand and plugging our ears, we are to be the salt of the earth (Matthew 5:13). Instead of turning our backs on what’s going on in society, we are to shine as lights in the world (Philippians 2:15). Salt cannot have a seasoning effect if it is left in the cupboard. It must come in contact with blandness before its saltiness can be realized.

Not to mention the biblical commands to show hospitality (Romans 12:13; 1 Timothy 3:2; Titus 1:8; 1 Peter 4:9). By holing up in our house, we were sending an unspoken message “not welcome” to our closest neighbors, many of whom we had never met — and many of whom probably didn’t know Christ.

We often think of hospitality as entertaining friends in our home for a meal. But the true definition of hospitality differs on three levels. First, hospitality doesn’t necessarily involve an invitation. Secondly, hospitality is extended to strangers, not friends. And thirdly, hospitality isn’t limited to your home.

If you want to get really technical, hospitality is making an uninvited stranger feel welcome in the space where God has placed you, no matter where that is. It can mean welcoming a stranger into your office at work. It can mean extending a warm greeting to a new face at church. It can mean putting your briefcase in your lap on the bus so someone can sit next to you. There are hundreds of other examples.

Halloween is a magnificent opportunity to show the love of Christ to strangers, which moves us much closer to the true definition of hospitality. Sure, these passing strangers are dressed funny and are lugging candy-filled pillow cases. But consider that no other 2-hour window during the year affords us such an obvious opportunity to reflect the glory of Christ to our community.

Joy and I still hand out candy like everyone else, but we include an invitation card to our church. It is subtle. But each time we drop one in a bag, we lift up a prayer that the card will make its way into a home that needs Christ, or that needs a church home. Our job is to plant the seeds and God will grant the fruit in His providence. You may want to use Gospel tracts. Either way, it’s a tremendous opportunity to reach out to the neighborhood with the message of hope.

It was only a few years ago that God helped me to see that as a believer, I had something of infinite value to offer to the witches, goblins, super heroes and scarecrows — and their parents — who graced our front door every year. And that removing myself from trick-or-treat was a terrible mistake. I was wasting our opportunity to simply show the love of Christ, drop an invitation to church into their pillow case — and who knows, maybe even start a conversation that leads to sharing the Gospel.

So this year, don’t retreat to the back bedroom or the basement. Turn on all the outside lights. Open your door and do everything you can to make your house an outpost of heaven — and your life a salty seasoning to your lost neighbors who need Christ. You won’t have this easy an opportunity until next year!

Here is my comment: 

I think that makes sense. I am sitting here in my house on Halloween, aka Reformation Day for we Germans out there, with no porch lights on and no candy or cards for the kiddos and their parents (who are gathered in each other's yards in chairs and around fire pits). And yet I do agree with your article. Really. I know I am missing an opportunity to hang with them. I had friends growing up that were witches, and they loved Halloween. They relished the evil that happens on it, the razors in the candy and so on. When I see fake decapitated heads and limbs hanging from trees, coffins in the yards, evil depictions, etc. I just shudder. I think Romans 1-3. I have absolutely no problem with others participating. None at all. I enjoy seeing the picts of the costumes, and hearing the stories, and buying the candy. I just am not free in my heart to actually participate tonight. The evil of tonight (well, and any night) pains my soul and I just don't want to be a part of it in any way. So I know I am free to take part (Romans 14-15), but my convictions do not allow me. Maybe I am wrong. Maybe I just missed a beautiful opportunity to mingle, but until I can clearly believe I am wrong I cannot deny my convictions. So have fun tonight. Check your candy. Eat gobs of it, and thanks for passing out invitation cards. May the Lord use your family tonight to be salt and light to a family in need of hope.

What do YOU think???

Ari's Philosophy of Counseling

Well, I finished it. The first draft anyway. I emailed it two pastors for their critiques. Now it is your turn. What do you think of "My Official Statement of Philosophy of Counseling"? I know it is not edited completely, but I am excited to be so close to finished with something! 

Counseling Philosophy for Arielle Corcoran

 

When man faces struggles, whether self-imposed or from external sources, deep at heart one must face God through His Scriptures and His Spirit, and come to peace with Him. Often we replace Him with wants that we over emphasize in our lives. Other times we struggle to trust Him in the midst of an ongoing hardship. Either way one needs to seek the truth about Who God is and what He has promised us, and rest in these. Then can the striving end and one return to obedience and peace of mind.

 

When people struggle with issues one needs to start at the circumstances and move deeper to the beliefs and wants they have about the issues at hand. This includes a look at their expectations about the circumstances and the people involved. At that heart level one can then go to the Scriptures and the Spirit and seek His guiding principles for changes, endurance, and for the hope needed to go on day to day.

 

Freeing and powerful change comes at the heart level through God’s Word and Spirit. Behavioral changes without addressing the beliefs and desires of the heart Scripturally cannot endure the messy ugly stuff of life.  Daily we have things that we need to submit to God. Sometimes we face something too large to tackle on our own, and our perspective is too wrapped up in emotion and circumstances to see God or His promises and commands to which we must cling. Often we need the counsel of another going with us to the Scriptures and in prayer helping us find life giving perspectives that return us to a strong relationship with the Lord, for His glory and our joy.

 

The church is the people of God. He has told us and equipped us to mentor /disciple one another. In times of crisis this one anothering is still appropriate and capable of bringing hope and change to others for the tools and the skills come straight from the love, grace and power of the Lord. A counselor is under the authority of the Lord, His Word and His Spirit. Practically speaking this takes place in a local family of Christ-followers under the authority of the elders of that group of believers.

 

Though it is helpful to use resources along with the Scriptures for the practical application of God’s principles one must handle these carefully. As a counselor of God’s Word I only use materials from authors that also believe the Scriptures are authoritative and inerrant. I would not want to use materials from authors that have their foundation in psychology, which does not have a godly foundation and often is at odds with the Lord and His Word. I believe what we have been given in the Scriptures is sufficient, “Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.’ Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.” 2 Cor 12.8-10 There is power and promise in the Word of God. For you. “Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good! Blessed is the one who takes refuge in Him!” Ps 34.8

Political Activism-1

We heard Gov. Sarah Palin speak today. Wow! She is every bit as good as Obama on the stage. I was very impressed with what we heard. Very. Finally. Most of it anyway. She talked about balancing the budget in 4 years. FOUR. And she ended with a strong push to take care of disabled/handicapped children. Now I wish we had gone to hear Barack Obama last week as well. Great experience. Easy to get there, park and get out. Wow! 

The unprepared Boy Scout. It was cold out in the clouds and wind. Brrr.


Jaime and Abigail Schechter went with us. Hubby Andrew picked up the tickets yesterday and Abigail got us VIP entrance due to having a stroller. Thanks Abigail!!!  Note the freezing Alexes who did not bring a jacket or sweatshirt. Brr again!

People were hootin and hollerin most of the time. It was very energetic. The opening band was the Bellamy Brothers. They were good. It was country music though. Not very multi-culturally sensitive. Felt sorry for the brothers that were there.

What a neat experience. Isn't homescholing great? We got to GO TO government class today. Hands on Learning!

Palin Ponderings-Part Deux

ONE MORE MUCH SHORTER post put today on my friend's blog:

http://dea-frommyhearttoyours.blogspot.com/2008/09/vote-biblically-and-be-light-for-him.html

OOO, that was long. Um, sorry. But also, thinking big picture here... Wives are under the headship of their own husband, not anyone else's. Men in general have no authority over women in general- since we are all equal in God's sight. Men AND women are both under the leadership positions (elders/deacons) of the church. Plus, since Palin is a woman and FOR life and actually faced a pre-birth announcement of handicaps for her son yet chose to have him along with teenage pregnancy, and since she did not FORCE (as I have heard some democrats accuse) her daughter to choose life, but has stood by her all the way in the post-pregnancy hoopla, perhaps other women will hear her message of the sanctity of life. It may be that her message is a bit more tolerable for some women. Would that God would use her that way.  

So, what do you think?! See need for corrections?

Palin Politics-Women in Leadership

I entered this in the comment section of a dear sister's blog:

http://dea-frommyhearttoyours.blogspot.com/2008/09/vote-biblically-and-be-light-for-him.html

Tell me what YOU think about this issue...

OK, so I guess I will put in my two cents worth. Well, you can have it for free. :) You said you missed me.... I also see no evidence in the Scriptures that commands a woman may not work outside the house. I see lots of reasons why it is great for her to not have to do so. I see it more and more difficult in our culture to fellowship d/t the fatigue of the women (who tend to hold the "social" calendar-planning, cleaning, cooking for said fellowship times) and the fact that they are running to and fro taking care of so many diverse matters. I see how no one being home to take care of kids and chores etc means huge shifts in our culture that I don't like seeing. It is difficult to make a "lovely" and peace filled home when distracted by so much work and business. It is difficult to reach our kid's hearts and characters when away from them more hours than not most of their lives. Of course mothers being home all day doesn't guarantee perfect outcome either. All that comes under His sovereignty. But the verses that teach us to love our families, to have things in order at home, to be an excellent wife do not say-only stay home once you marry. The Proverbs 31 wife seems to be busy telling her servants what to do at her home all day while she is off buying, selling, trading. She DOES do many things for her family and things are in order- so to speak- at home, but she isn't sitting around the house all day doing it herself. It clearly shows her in commerce and the community as well as at home. Her HEART is turned home to her family and to quality care for them, but she is also out of the home busy as well. It seems that the Lord is concerned about her motives and her character more than where she is busy all day. The Scriptures also command women be taught. Well, why? So we can have book clubs at home with the other ladies around us (really difficult to find now a days cause they are all at work where we apparently should not be-so how to befriend them today?) and appear knowledgeable? Why teach them? Can't we just go to our husbands and church elders for information if we don't really need to be taught? Why homeschool my sons? I am just a woman. In the whole Bro/Sister thing of things- should I even teach them? Seriously. Think about that all the way through. As for voting, we are commanded to respect our government- even tho it is flawed. GOD puts the leaders in place. HE asks us to respect them even when clearly unrepentant sinners. OUR current system asks that we vote in leaders. I am not personally thrilled about any current Pres. candidate or the VP for that matter, but my current system asks me to pick one. So I will. Be they man or woman. I will pick what I think is the most Godly of choices and trust God with the outcome. Also I'll be praying. :0) Clearly in today's society we have few men seeking to be Godly leaders at home or in the country. They are not all evil, but not that great at leading or of strong character. Therefore I am not afraid of the Lord putting a woman in the office of leadership if no man is up to it at the moment. That is HIS choice. It is not a sin for a woman to lead the country or Deborah would have been an abomination to the Lord. Yet HE put her there. Yes, I know, she was the exception to the rule. I am not thrilled with women leaders as a whole- hormones and babies and homes make her a torn heart. Men do not seem to be wired to intentionally take care of all that unless pressed to when widowed or left by wives. But still, the Scriptures never say it was bad to be led by Deborah. I agree with women not teaching from the pulpit, but I have seen the Lord use some for His good and glory, and I struggle to call them apostate. I just want Jesus preached. It is all about Him and not so much about all this lifestyle stuff. Really. The heart matters more to Him than the externals. The externals DO testify to what is in the heart, but they are only a window to the soul- they are NOT THE testimony. Who Jesus is and What He did is the testimony. We need to respond with love and compassion and truth (about Him) and so forth. The color of your clothes, the beat of your music and whatnot do NOT save or even DRAW others to Christ. That is the Spirit's work. Again, we tend to put too much emphasis on our won works. Also she is not in sin with her own husband because HE has not asked her to step down. He is has freed her up by taking on some of the responsibilities at home. If this is OK with HIM, who are we to accuse her of disrespecting him? It is between them. Again Scriptures do not say that he can't help out at home. Please tell me you don't know of any verses that say so. :0) I understand your arguments. Really. I especially understand the heart behind them that truly loves her Lord, her husband and her son. I understand that you want to honor them all and glorify the Lord in your time on this earth. God is so good to us, Dea. It makes sense that you would want to sing His praises and be found faithful. I only caution you to read His Word carefully. There is very little in it about lifestyle and very much in it about our hearts and our character. Oh that we, His children and some of His visible evidence in this world, could but be humble, meek, loving and joyful creatures. Oh that we could be so in love with Him that those around us would see that they are missing something. Obama, McCain, Palin and that other VP guy. Does it really matter, in the big picture, which one the Lord puts in the white house? I will do my part and pay attention and vote for the one that I believe is most inline with a utopian America where God is valued. Then I will pray and trust the Lord for all the rest. As for calling Palin a feminist unChristlike woman: well, I can pray for her too and trust that the Lord is sovereign over her and her family as well. If He needs for her to make changes then He will make sure it happens. She needs our prayers not criticism. She gets enough of that from the world. We can off her something better- prayer and love.

Patiently Hope and Quietly Wait

"One affords himself no pity when in this case, because it seems so unreasonable, even sinful, to be troubled without manifest cause. Yet troubled the man is, even in the very depths of his spirit. If those who laugh at such melancholy did but feel the grief of it for one hour, their laughter would be sobered into compassion."

At times all of life seems to be against you. It chews you up and leaves you in an exhausted heap on the floor. It does not make sense. An end is not visible. And you wonder, is it worth the cost? Does my breath make a difference?

Other times you go through things where you watch brothers and sisters hurt each other, and you know, you KNOW that is not what the Lord meant when He left us down here together. We were meant to live in grace, mercy, love. It is especially painful when hurt comes from our "family." And you wonder, does anyone see Jesus in all this?

Then there are times when you know you are on the edge of something. Some ministry. Some responsibility that you know you cannot meet. Not in your flesh. No Way. And that is scary.

What if one finds themselves facing all of those at once? What if the Accuser is reminding you of your past? What if the Author is showing you glimpses of your future? What if your Flesh is screaming for clarity in your today? Could one find themselves weary in heart, body, mind?

I think so. I know so. I've just come away from heart wrenching experiences with brothers and sisters behaving badly. I had no idea how much it saddened my soul. The disillusionment still not fully understood. I have gone through changes of jobs, schedule, church family, my neighbor just found out she may not have long to live- and she has young children, then there are the usual stresses, and on it goes. Now I am about to take the second and final level of the counseling program. It is intense. It forces you to take a good look at your heart. And I have been avoiding some things with the Lord that I will not be able to avoid much longer. Tell me how to be perky?

Last Sunday I was thinking that maybe God wants us to live in parallel worlds? One reality that is all the negatives that must be daily faced- world hunger, poverty, meanness, the budget; one reality that is all the positives that give us the ability to always rejoice, give thanks and sing with abandon. So now I wonder how to co-exist? How does one live in both? At one time, or in seasons of each? I don't want to pretend the one does not exist, but I do not want to wallow in sorrow either. What does this look like? Why is it so exhausting?

And then I figure something is just wrong with me, a defect. Why am I like this? I hear my mother telling me to quit being so dramatic. My father telling me to stop thinking so much- we never thought about these things. [The WE being that more enlightened generation from which he hails.] Smile. And I know I am a disappointment to my Father. A useless tool for the Spirit. A dismal picture of Jesus Christ. So I just sit on the deck watching the sun rise, drinking my coffee and wait to go Home. For I cannot possibly be any use here on this earth to my Lord .

And Then, a message from my Father....

Ah, Spurgeon. His sermon about depression and the spiritual man "just happens" to appear in my Inbox. He tells it like it is with no games and no confusion. He also tells it with power and purpose and praise. I have been down. Really down. The things that just were and the things to come occupying too much of my heart and soul. The Accuser reminding me of my failures every day. On top of that the complete weakness and uselessness of my flesh have weighed heavy on my heart lately. Waking up each day waiting for the night. Waiting for the rest, that never comes.

If you find yourself struggling with hearts- Gods', yours, others'. If you find yourself downcast. Read the sermon by Spurgeon in the above link. It is long. Very long. But therein you will find encouragement for your soul. Purpose for your pain. Strength for your walk. Are you tired? Read on. Are you disillusioned? Read on. Are you dull? Find the Reason to shine again. It is there. He is there.

Psalm 27:13-14

I am still confident of this:

I will see the goodness of the LORD

in the land of the living.

Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

"Set small store by present rewards, be grateful for earnests by the way, but look for the recompensing joy hereafter. Continue, with double earnestness, to serve your Lord when no visible result is before you.

Any simpleton can follow the narrow path in the light: faith’s rare wisdom enables us to march on in the dark with infallible accuracy, since she places her hand in that of her Great Guide. Between this and Heaven there may be rougher weather yet, but it is all provided for by our Covenant Head. In nothing let us be turned aside from the path which the divine call has urged us to pursue." All quotes -Charles H. Spurgeon

Chivalry Is Dead?!

Question:
How many men does it take to jump start a car?
Answer:
None

It was rush hour when I stopped for gas. The lines a bit long because the price was really low for this area (I scope this out daily). Almost all the people filling up or waiting in lines were men.

Now let me preface this with the fact that I am not a feminist. Not at all. I do not want to be a man, nor do I worry about equality. We are both equal in God's sight. Good enough for me. I have nothing to prove.

That said understand I do appreciate a gentleman, but they are an endangered species. Is that just in the north, Cindi?! John C. Whitcomb is the epitome of a gentleman, but he is ancient and will probably not be on this tired earth much longer. Oh, I digress.

This evening the man in front of me had trouble pulling away from the pump because, he said after getting out to check, that the vehicle in front of him would not start and was blocking the way. So I offered to back up and the car behind me was gracious enough to back up and he left.

As I pulled up to his vacated spot the lady, with a car load of small children, asked me if I had jumper cables. Fortunately (did I just write fortunately!) my batter just quit a week ago, and my dear husband left the cables in my trunk (after buying me a new battery). So I gave them to her and proceeded to pump gas into my car which was behind her car. I could not get to her front to attach the cables and so I started the pump filling my car.

I then asked the 3 men around us, in their big, American made trucks, if they would quickly jump start her car as soon as they finished. They had all begun filling their tanks long before me. It would have taken them what, 2 minutes?!

They all said no. They all gave different answers:
1. I have a trailer and it would block traffic when I pull forward. I disagreed with him, but it was a no go. He barely wanted to look at me. He COULD have pulled forward and the vehicle behind still reach the pump.
2. I have to pick up my daughter from volleyball right now. I was amazed that he could not spare at most 2 minutes to start her car. The cables were mine to pack up when it was finished. Alas, it was a no way. He barely wanted to look at me.
3. It will mess up the electrical components on my truck. WHAT? WHAT? So I asked him if he was just going to leave her like this? Well, he LOUDLY informed me that he was not going to mess up his electrical. Again, WHAT? He really struggled to look me in the eyes as well.

Honestly, all three struggled to look me in the eyes. I loudly proclaimed that I guess chivalry is dead. At that point a woman, yes, a woman, in an old junker, pulled out of the spot behind mr. electrical concerns. She jump started the poor, downtrodden and discouraged lady's car. All of us were amazed that NONE of the three men would help, nor would any of the other men waiting in line come over and help. It took women to help this woman. All the men stood there or sat there and looked at the ground.

I don't know. Maybe it is just a chivalry thing, but she was of a certain culture as well. A culture different from all the men there. I wonder if she had been a blond bombshell in a swanky car if the men would have slobbered all over themselves to get to her.

I know, that sounds terrible. I was so mad I could yell. I was so disheartened that I barely stopped my tears. What a world.

Needless to say the boys were told under NO UNCERTAIN TERMS were they EVER to leave a lady stranded. EVER.

And color? Different colors just makes the world more beautiful. That's all there is about color. How boring if we were all the same?!

Signed, a disheartened and naive woman.

Who Am I?

So do you ever ask yourself that question? I know Whose I am, but who am I? 

So many things can make up a woman's life: Wife, Mother, Daughter of man, Daughter of The King, Friend, Sister, Neighbor, Employee or Employer, Athlete, Hobby Enthusiast, Servant, and on and on. 

So on which one does the woman concentrate? How does she do one well and keep up with the others? Does she just concentrate on all of them depending on which one is in the most need at the moment? You know, survival method. Can she be all that and simplify as well? Is she doomed to failure because so many things are pulling at her?

Some women (people) seem to be really good at one main thing in their life. How do you concentrate on one main thing? Who takes care of the rest?

What about passion, joy, intentionality?! Where do they fit in to it all?

What if the woman likes to do some things better than others, but has a responsibility to fulfill the other things as well? 

And then there is always the, "I'm a failure," thing that women seem to be drawn to- in numerous areas of their life.

Philippians 3:13-15

Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

All of us who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you.

So, Ladies, I don't know where you are in life: happy, content, at peace, encouraged, concerned, fearful, frustrated, exhausted. But I do know that there is an Ever Present Help, and He has promised that this is not the end but the road to the beginning of forever.

I may not know "who I am," and it may drive me nuts at times, but I know there is One that has a plan and a purpose for me. Day by day He is willing to lead me in it. So I may get discouraged or weary or even fearful, but as long as I know Whose I am- there is hope!!!

Life Lessons on the Road

The Lord knows how I feel about driving, about traffic. He so very often uses the car to tame my heart. Today I drove some friends to the airport for their 2 week jaunt in Ireland. On the way home I had classic traffic issues on 75N. 

Now I try to plan ahead- potty trips before I hit the road, traffic reports to see what's going on, watch the other side of the road to see what I may have to deal with on the trip back, I even called my hubby to get an up-to-date report 'cause it looked a bit tight on 75N as I was heading South. I tried. 

I even went through the mental counsel as I drove North: you know 71 is worse- stay the course; you know that the middle lane moving faster is just a lie as soon as you switch lanes it will slow down and the left lane will move ahead- stay the course; you COULD get around the semi really quick and go 

back in the left lane- but just stay the course. Be still. Accept.

It is just that the middle lane never slowed. I was stuck looking at the back of the truck, and couldn't see ahead, and was hitting the brake constantly (since the truck was as well). Stop. Go. Stop. Go. On the HIGHWAY! The middle lane just kept moving ahead faster and faster. I SO wanted to change lanes. It is a really tense situation for me. The middle lane was WINNING. I was being LEFT BEHIND. And I couldn't see anything either. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe. 

Then it hit me. Another life lesson for you, Dear Daughter. Just like in the Word:

Psalm 119:104-106

From Your precepts I get understanding;

Therefore I hate every false way.

Your Word is a lamp to my feet

And a light to my path.

I have sworn and I will confirm it,

That I will keep Your righteous ordinances.

His lamp and light often only show you what is right ahead, just in front of you. Do you trust Me, daughter? Do you trust where I lead? Do you trust the route I will take? Do you trust My process?

Well, NO. I wanted away from the truck. I only occasionally got a glimpse ahead when on a curve or hill and I wanted a clear view of the road ahead. NO. I wanted to go faster, to keep up with the others and to succeed. Even to win. NO. I had a plan and a purpose mapped out for my afternoon and this truck got in my way. It hampered my plans. Changed them even. Drat.

Then it hit again. This is exactly how I live my everyday life. How often do I fight the Lord in this very way?! I MADE myself stay behind it as a sort of discipline. I told myself I had to stay behind it until after 275, THEN I could switch lanes and plow ahead. Baby steps in discipline. Ironically I switched as soon as I cleared 275 and what do you think happened? So predictable.

The ever-faithful Lord wanted to remind me of the things in my heart, of they many ways I fight His plan and purpose and process. I am not sovereign- I know that does not surprise any of you, but occasionally it seems to surprise me. :0) So on I drove, His way. I got back to their home safely and even more relaxed than when I began. I dropped off their car. I decided to enjoy the ride and the music playing and He was kind enough to return me to my own home in one piece albeit much more humble. Much humbled. 

May the good Lord reign!!! 

I do tend to think my way of going will be a heart attack on the highway- sorry to the other drivers. But then- you'll have driven me to it!!!

Accountable for My Time...

Ephesians 5:15-17 Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

Time management is something with which I struggle. I do believe I JUST posted earlier this week about NOT being distracted from the things of the world and then yesterday I spent HOURS on the computer. I did not do anything on my list of chores and I am frustrated. I did not even eat all day. How does that happen? One gets on the puter for a few moments to check email, Facebook, Twitter, the Blog and then suddenly it has been HOURS?!

Does anyone else find this disturbing? Sure, I can justify it. I was connecting with friends and loved ones. I was reading or posting blogs about God (well, and recipes, and blog skins since I am STILL dissatisfied with mine- found a lovely French Country one, Pastor Dave, but it would not load). I was reading and passing on prayer requests. This is all good, but did I sacrifice best for good? I don't know. I know I needed to exercise and read my Bible and Pray and do neglected chores and still more deep cleaning. THOSE were sparse or not accomplished at all due to the many hours I was online.

So I have decided that I need to be more intentional (what is the word, Cynthia, Purposeful?) about HOW I use my time. It really matters to the Lord what we do with our time. And it seems the enemy is so very cunning with his distractions. See Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis. I cannot ever get past the middle of the book. I get too convicted!

I included a link that gives a brief overview of time blocking- my husband's suggestion. It seems guyish, but effective. So soon and very soon I plan to block time :0) to figure out how to block time so that I can actually get on the computer and still do other things as well.

There really can be no excuses. God has called us to be good stewards of our thoughts, words, actions, time, talents, treasures. I really would like Him to find me more faithful.

If you struggle with this, I would be happy to work on this with you. I crave accountability.
So... Redeem the Time!

You can copy paste this and then type in time blocking into the Google Search box to see the article:

http://ezinearticles.com/?Time-Management-Tip--Time-Blocking-is-a-Key-
Time-Management-Tip&id=629533

Distracted by Stuff

I just finished reading the book, Blessed Child, by Ted Dekker and Bill Bright. It is a work of fiction that seeks to challenge our walk with the Lord. Bill Bright, taking his example from Christ, likes to use stories to reach the heart with the truths of the doctrines from Scripture.

The child has the gift of healing. This is controversial, I know, but he gives all credit and honor to the Father, Son and Spirit. In the book the Lord does some amazing acts, all for His glory, all to draw hearts to His Son and His offer of forgiveness and life. Constantly is it questioned which is more important, healing of the limbs or healing of the heart? The answer is shown to be the heart. The reader is drawn to Christ and to repentance and to worship on a level that most Evangelical Americans do not reach.

Look, this stuff makes me nervous, but I do believe that the mystical is something we either run from or demand in a chaotic manner- here in the states. Why? Why do we, "throw the baby out with the bathwater?" God IS mystical. And, yes, God IS orderly. So....

But that is not my main point of this blog. It is that the book reminded me that so often I am distracted by the cares of the world, and that is choking. So often I am directed by what is seen, rather than what is unseen. There is a whole Kingdom out there beyond the thin skin of this world, and I am worried about my weight, my thinning hair, my color scheme in the house, and so on! Good grief. I spent the last two weeks deep cleaning the house. I have to spend the next week de-cluttering the upstairs so that we can get new carpet. Just HOW is the Kingdom being impacted by all this? All this time? All this effort? When it will all burn in the end?!

These things are of such little value. Yes, I need and want to be a good steward of that which the Lord has given me- hopefully making the world around me beautiful and orderly, but to what extend should this clutter my mind? Do I look like I am a daughter of the King Most High? Does it flow from my pores (think sweet smelling incense rising to the Lord)? Do I even BEGIN to tap into the power of the Lord? The presence of the Lord?

I am worldly. I am weak. And this is not the abundant life to which Jesus Christ calls me. I only have one life on this earth, and I want it to count for Jesus- even in the mundane things of life. I want to live with purpose & power, with clarity & confidence, with simplicity & beauty.

Can anyone say self-denial?

So, how do we spur each other on, dear brothers and sisters? Do you have this struggle?